Into My Mind

Monday, June 26, 2006

.........More bland than dry toast......

This morning, I happened to catch Kathy Griffin's Allegedly stand up special on Bravo. Yes I know, I tend to like polarizing people, Angelina, Margaret Cho, Wanda Sykes, Bill Maher, Michael Moore and Sarah Silverman--oh my!


Anyway, she was talking about her "Gwyneth" encounter on the red carpet a few years ago and I was not surprised to find out that she (Gwyneth) was as Christian Finnegan would say, "A pretentious jackass". There are many examples of this, either watch her interviews where she is always condescending to the host or find the video of her presenting a Golden Globe to Sir Anthony Hopkins in a faux and horrible English accent. I am aware that she was in the English drama Emma but seriously, she couldn't even pronounce Anthony correctly...she constantly referred to him as "Ant-tinnee" WTF?! I'm not a hardcore fan of his but I at least know how to say his name!


When she was on Late Night with Conan O'Brien, she bragged about how she threw her friend a bachelorette party. They had tea, did yoga and went to a sex shop. And no, I am not kidding, she seemed pretty damn proud of herself as she told Conan of her "wacky" adventure. Maybe her friend is exactly like her, incredibly dull and snooty. But my God, with the exception of the trip to the sex shop, that had to the lamest bachelorette party EVER! Tea??? Forget about that.....YOGA? Granted, yoga isn't exactly like spinning or Tae Bo, but the last thing I want to do on my very last night of "single life" is fucking exercise! Because believe or not, I am a lady. Therefore, I'd prefer to do all my heavy sweating and awkward positioning for the wedding night or if you're Britney Spears, the bathroom floor of the nearest Starbucks.


Then there was Shallow Hal....I can't believe I'm about to type this, that movie was so below Jack Black. As a chubby guy, I don't think he honestly believes that there is a fit and incredibly attractive man within him just waiting to get out! She had the balls to advocate the film's message "Looks shouldn't matter" yes, because she definitely adopted that as her personal motto when she dated fuglies like Brad Pitt, Ben Affleck(I know, I know but there are uglier men out there), that rich guy...wasn't he an heir to something....and English rocker Chris Martin.


Look, I'm not going to deny her best talents, singing and acting. However, I'll admit that I have learned one thing from Ms. Paltrow...I know now how to not be a pretentious boob. Hell, it would take 12 of her elitist ones just to fill one of my humble bra cups.

1 Comments:

  • lmao, she is a pretentious snob isn't she?

    She gets onmy last nerves with her high and mighty attitude.

    By Blogger Dreamlover, at 9:14 PM  

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